Tuesday, December 30, 2014

A Resolution – WHY?


I recently wrote an article about the importance of asking“Why?”  It put focus on the importance of developing our knowledge, communication and our relationships by asking for more information than might initially be offered to us.   However, asking “Why?” is at best only half the battle.  The other, and perhaps more important half comes from the value of offering “Why”.  Telling someone “Why” is equally if not more important as it offers clarity and understanding, rather than putting it upon the other person to be bold, or sophisticated, enough to ask for it.

In our day to day communications we have found more and more ways to abbreviate ourselves.  Brevity however, has at times trumped clarity.  Offering “Why” gives the other person the information to do differently, or better.  It provides information and opens up communication and understanding.  Say for example you need to have a direct report re-do part of a project.  Offering “Why” eliminates the possibility that s/he will guess as to what is wrong, and possibly make the same or other problematic errors.  Telling a friend or loved one “Why” you don’t want to go to a
particular restaurant for example will allow him/her to better understand you and your preferences, know more about
you, and perhaps enable him or her to make choices that are more to your liking in the future.

Some people fear it is presumptuous to offer the “Why”.  They believe that it assumes the other person cares or should care about our reasons.  They are right.  It does have that presumption, and it should.  We should all surround ourselves by those who care about us, want us to succeed, and want to know us better.  Just as we should distance ourselves from those who do not.  Likewise, we should demonstrate our caring of others by asking for "Why" when it is not offered so that we can learn about and understand them. 

In this New Year, perhaps this is a resolution you can embrace.  To ask why, to offer why, and to only surround yourself with people who care about you. 

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