Why I Hate the Law

Do you know what I find frustrating?  Laws.  I find them frustrating because the effort to follow the law often neglects to bring resolution to the problem it’s intended to resolve.  My clients often engage me for this very reason.  They want to bring real change, but simply keeping with the law doesn’t get them there. 

Take for example AB1825, a law enacted in 2007 requiring Sexual Harassment training.  While businesses dutifully follow it, thereby demonstrating legal compliance, there has been no discernable drop in the prevalence of sexual harassment claims in the decade since its inception.  The EEOC study report on these findings was released this summer.  They also found that policies to address discrimination and harassment, though less studied, have similarly poor results. 

Sadly, none of this information surprises me.  Why?  Because AB1825 gave employers a single answer to a multi-faceted problem.  Much like many other laws, the outcomes were an afterthought.  And, once this ‘solution’ is given, businesses no longer have the same responsibility to figure it out for themselves. 

Of even greater concern, the law helps insulate the businesses from legal action.  As a result, businesses who are not inclined to improve, have even less reason for doing so.  The EEOC found evidence of this.  In fact, some of the most pernicious forms of discrimination and harassment were largely ignored by organizations as they were done at the hands of a “superstar”.  Rather than risk the loss of this rainmaker, businesses found ways to work around the problem, often by transferring victims or taking other steps to mollify them. 

So, what can a business owner or HR do?  Here is my multi-faceted suggestion that you can use to bring change to your workplace.

Clarify the Problem

As each business environment is as unique as the people working in it, begin by identifying the people or circumstances that are at the center of complaints.  Then ask yourself, What would need to be different for the problems to stop?  What could make the problems resurface?  As you ask these questions, you begin to hone in on what needs to be done.

Get Creative

Begin by brainstorming – with a small team of thoughtful individuals.  Initial ideas may look like those tried in the past, write them down but keep going and explore alternative ideas.  Create the goal of generating 10 new ideas.  Doing so forces out-of-the-box thinking and is likely to bring you novel and workable ideas. 

Test the Success

Enact the best solutions and see what happens.  Does change come?  Are there unexpected consequences?  Continue to work between creativity and testing out solutions until you find one that yields desired results without dire consequences.

Share Outcomes

The business world needs more ideas – so share what works.  Blog, speak or Post your ideas below!

A Resolution – WHY?

I recently wrote an article about the importance of asking“Why?”  It put focus on the importance of developing our knowledge, communication and our relationships by asking for more information than might initially be offered to us.   However, asking “Why?” is at best only half the battle.  The other, and perhaps more important half comes from the value of offering “Why”.  Telling someone “Why” is equally if not more important as it offers clarity and understanding, rather than putting it upon the other person to be bold, or sophisticated, enough to ask for it.

In our day to day communications we have found more and more ways to abbreviate ourselves.  Brevity however, has at times trumped clarity.  Offering “Why” gives the other person the information to do differently, or better.  It provides information and opens up communication and understanding.  Say for example you need to have a direct report re-do part of a project.  Offering “Why” eliminates the possibility that s/he will guess as to what is wrong, and possibly make the same or other problematic errors.  Telling a friend or loved one “Why” you don’t want to go to a

particular restaurant for example will allow him/her to better understand you and your preferences, know more about
you, and perhaps enable him or her to make choices that are more to your liking in the future.

Some people fear it is presumptuous to offer the “Why”.  They believe that it assumes the other person cares or should care about our reasons.  They are right.  It does have that presumption, and it should.  We should all surround ourselves by those who care about us, want us to succeed, and want to know us better.  Just as we should distance ourselves from those who do not.  Likewise, we should demonstrate our caring of others by asking for "Why" when it is not offered so that we can learn about and understand them. 

In this New Year, perhaps this is a resolution you can embrace.  To ask why, to offer why, and to only surround yourself with people who care about you. 

What Matters Most (to me)?

I have a novel approach to the New Year’s Resolution and it’s my own goal for 2014.  Forget the typical resolutions.  My plan?  To do less, to take on less, and with that goal - to be more present.

It sounds easy, but I think this will be one of my hardest resolutions yet.  It starts by taking stock of what I am doing.  Here’s what I know:  I am busy – to a near chaotic level – most of the time.  I don’t even know what’s taking up my time.  Is it purposeful?  Is it necessary? 
And I see it all around me.  We are better connected worldwide, and yet less connected to those we see face to face: our neighbors, co-workers, and friends.  We can shop online at any time day or night (saving us time, right?) but are too busy to get together with those we care about. 

In my own life I recognize other elements.  I don’t sleep enough.  I feel compromised in spending time with my husband and children.  And yet I still feel pushed to do more. 

Perhaps you are experiencing the same pressures on your time, and feeling the same need to evaluate.

Here’s my plan (at least the start of it). 

1.      Take stock of what I’m doing now.  I’m going to take one week (nights and weekends included) to pay attention to the details of how I spend my time.  I will jot down notes throughout each day of what I am doing with my time.  I will likewise make a list of those less frequent but often time-consuming activities like managing my QuickBooks.

2.      Charting and categorizing.  Next I’m going to set aside a day to pour over those notes.  I’m going to create categories to identify how my time is spent, and how much time is spent on each activity.  I will also jot down the purpose (short or long term) for engaging in each behavior, and its potential value to me or others. 

3.      Analyze the results.  Now seeing where and how my time is spent, where do changes need to be made?  Am I spending too much time on a particular business activity?  Do I have a good balance between personal time and business time?  Am I operating on each during the right hours of the day?  Are my activities necessary and purposeful?  Am I wasting time online?  So many questions that I cannot answer until I survey my time.

4.      Identify what I want.  Once I know what I am doing, it’s easier to evaluate what I’d like to be doing (with a realistic sense of how I currently spend my time).  How much time do I want to spend on business activities?  Do I want to devote nights and weekends exclusively to family?  How often do I want to go to the gym?  What does my preferred week (hour by hour) really look like?

5.      Create a new plan (I hope this part will be fun). Once I identify what I am doing, and what I’d like to be doing, I hope to be able to create a schedule that works for me.  Perhaps this will be liberating as I realize that I don’t have time to participate in that discussion group I felt pressured to join, or to attend that function clear across town.  It may also mean committing to an undisturbed four hours of prep time for a program that I typically spend six hours preparing.  As I become aware of how my time is spent, compared to how I’d like to spend it, I can make those tough decisions without feeling compromised.

6.      Making it work.  In creating a new plan, I also need to find a way to make it workable.  I’ll look to see what activities can be delegated to others.  Perhaps a subordinate can do the research; another parent can maintain the volunteer list; my husband can do the grocery shopping.  Other items may need to be released.  Maybe I need to limit my time connecting with friends/colleagues on social media, give up writing a fresh article for each newsletter I write, or stop using QuickBooks to account for every dollar I spend.

7.      Making peace with my choices.  As I choose what to change, delegate or let go of, I am sure to experience feelings of sadness or frustration.  Change is hard.  But I must also take stock of what I will be getting in exchange for these sacrifices:  A better work/life balance; a clearer sense of my own purposeful activity; more time with my husband and children. 

I have a hunch that as I manage my way through these 7 steps, I will start to feel more in control of my time and happier with my daily activities.  Whether you need to make changes personally, professionally, or (like me) across the board, choosing to do less may be the best choice you can make.

That Internal Argument

Do you find yourself engaging in internal arguments?  The kind that runs through your head as you’re trying to relax or interrupts what might otherwise be mental quiet time?  With January being a time for resolutions – perhaps one healthy resolution to consider is letting go of those unhealthy internal conversations.  

While these battles in our mind may serve a purpose - by helping us to think things through or by providing an outlet for our frustrations - they often do so at a cost.  Such arguments often signal our inability to move past a problem or conflict.  And, as the conflict repeats in your head, lingers, and remains unresolved, it actually damages the relationship you were most likely hoping to preserve.

The alternative - bringing up the conversation with that person whom you are arguing - sounds daunting, but it doesn’t have to be.  Here are 5 steps to making that conversation safe and productive.

1.      Forewarn – Tell the person (you’re in mental conflict with) that you need to talk about a past issue that’s been playing on your mind.  Let them know this a conversation to bring about a better understanding – not to find fault.  At this point, don’t elaborate on any details.  If the timing isn’t appropriate, make a plan for when you will both have time to talk. 

2.      Agree on Basic Rules – Set simple rules by starting on one’s they will like to hear.  For example, no blaming.  Other good rules to follow are: no interrupting, ask questions only when the other is done speaking, and stay on the subject (avoid bringing up other issues). 

3.      Take Responsibility – Explain the issue and why it is important to you that it be discussed.  Remember they may not have thought about it at all.  It may be helpful to explain your feelings (eg: frustrated, misunderstood, angry) as a way to demonstrate the importance of the discussion, but be careful not to use this as a way to place blame.

4.      Share Points of View – At this point it is appropriate to dive into the details of the issue, but remember most of what you will need to discuss is not facts, but your perspective.  Take the time to share the nuances of why the situation upset or hurt you – and why it continues to sit with you.  Have this become a discussion where they also share their thoughts and point of view.

5.      Determine Outcomes – As you listen to each other’s perspective, you will work toward developing a shared understanding of what happened, and what if anything, should be handled differently in the future.  Discuss these until you are both comfortable that you have reached a new understanding.  Close the conversation by thanking the other person for being open to the discussion, for listening, and for helping you to clear your mind of the situation.

Don’t Stall Out on the Business Highway

In mid-June I heard a report on the radio regarding the American Automobile Association (AAA). They stated that the number of roadside calls AAA is getting, due to vehicles running out of gas while on the road, has more than doubled from this time last year. The not-so-surprising explanation? Skyrocketing fuel prices.

I’ve noticed the same thing in the business world. As the impact of the economy and our undetermined political future causes concern, I’m seeing the movers, shakers and decision makers becoming still or indecisive in their business practices. In times of economic strain and an uncertain future, fear seems to have a paralyzing effect. Rather than spending the money that must be spent, be it on fuel for our car, or services for our business, some people are hunkering down and doing nothing…hoping that somehow this storm will pass them by.

Unfortunately that strategy doesn’t work. It leaves those people stranded on the side of the road while others, who accept the reality, move forward. Jack Hinsche, Managing Partner of the accounting firm Windes & McClaughry explains, “Peoples’ perception of this economic ‘recession’ has lead to cost control and managing of the bottom-line.” However, these cost-cutting decisions are not always logical. Hinsche notes that his firm is feeling the effect. “Collections and follow-up have become necessary. A typically prompt payment is being stretched to 90 days and more.” Hinsche continues, “People are pushing to the inevitable.”

Kenneth Keller, President of Renaissance Executive Forums, sees a better choice: Make the decision to spend money even when times are tough. Keller consults and trains executives and business owners. He observes “I find the economy to be okay for people who know how to use it as an opportunity.” At his company, “We are choosing to grow, not shrink. I have made the decision not to participate in any economic slowdown.” Both Hinsche and Keller recognize marketing as a key part of their plan to keep business moving. Hinsche comments on the necessity of “investing in core values.” Beyond marketing, his firm is committed to keeping with its “people first” culture. This means budget cuts have not been made in the areas of training, coaching or professional development. This is a particularly noteworthy choice; when you recognize that people are essential to a business just as fuel is essential to a vehicle…without them you’ll have no movement.

Safety in the Workplace

In turbulent times, a first step in managing your staff and your business is to create a safety net. Employees are under just as much stress and strain as their bosses, but often with far less to fall back on when times are tough. This is not the time to evoke panic. Keller notes, “For those that rely on others to generate an income (employees of a company), it is a scary time.”

Cutting out ancillary services is appropriate when it’s necessary to stave off reductions in the workforce, but when done simply to maintain the same profit margin, consider the message it sends to staff. If you are transparent with this decision making, you’re effectively telling your staff that they matter less than the level of profit for the business. This is a risky maneuver at best. If you do not tell them, the situation is liable to be even worse. Staff may assume this is a “last resort” and concern themselves with the possibility of layoffs or cutbacks. The snowballing effect as staff becomes concerned with job loss or salary cuts includes a drop in teamwork, lowered morale and reduced productivity; all of which undermine the intended goal of insulating profits and maintaining the status quo.

In building a safety net, it’s essential to communicate with your entire staff about the status of the company during these challenging economic times. Tell them what the impact has been on the bottom line, explain the company’s immediate and long term plans, and make clear the reasons for those plans. Perhaps the company can retain the full workforce without change as long as sales don’t drop beneath a particular threshold. Or, maybe you know which departments are likely to experience layoffs first, and which ones last. In explaining the situation, keep a positive outlook, but be honest and realistic. Keeping your staff informed empowers them to help, and allows them to be a part of the solution.

Profits now vs. Profits later

It is anticipated that during tough times profits will go down, but trying to stave off any decrease of profitability is likely to come with other significant costs. The importance then is having a vision and looking toward the future. Know that how you handle it now, will determine what comes next. Where do you want your company to be when the tough times are past? Trying to play catch up with what you’ve neglected or being poised and ready to move as opportunity strikes? Making the tough decisions, and the right ones at this time, is critical.

In evaluating your business expenses, two questions to explore are:

• What do I need to spend money on?
• How does it benefit me (my organization)?

While many will turn to “discretionary” spending as the first place to make cuts, it may be necessary to re-evaluate what is truly discretionary. Services to grow or maintain the business – via employee development or marketing - may be of greater significance than originally thought. Cutting costs in these areas will most likely cause business to slow further, and staff to feel more at risk.

Making the Cuts

Unfortunately, it’s easy to make cuts when tangible benefits are difficult to measure. Examine company spending patterns and any available metrics or data that offer evidence as to the value of each expense that you are looking to cut. As you perform the cost-benefit analysis, keep your vision broad. Reducing some expenditures will have minimal impact on productivity and morale, while others may have an unknown result or undesired consequence and should be done as a last resort only. “Marketing and employees are typically an area people make the cut first.” warns Hinsche who sees this as a mistake. He recommends instead that businesses “reduce expenses in occupancy costs including travel and administrative expenses.” A flexible work schedule or telecommuting are options to consider that fall within this plan – staff benefit from reduced travel costs, the business from reduced overhead.

In selecting the best plan for your company, be creative. Brainstorm with colleagues, consider several alternatives, and perhaps, if it’s in the budget, consult with a business advisor for an outside perspective of the situation. Remember even short term decisions have a long-term impact.

Outshine the Competition

While it may be tricky determining the right path for your business, consider the rewards. A forward-thinking attitude will lead others to you from the outside. You stand to outshine your competition who sits idly by, and position yourself to grow as you capture their talent and their customers.

Making thoughtful decisions and planned actions in this turbulent time has profound benefits. In accepting and managing the challenges before you and communicating them with your staff, you demonstrate leadership and vision. You stabilize your staff, retain your top talent, strengthen productivity and keep teamwork high.

Yes, the road ahead is rough – but by keeping business and employee services full, like your car’s gas tank, you will get where you need to go.

Why a blog?

All too often I hear the same story... It starts with the comment "I wish I knew you earlier". The story continues with an unfortunate tale of woe arising from an employment or business situation in which a dispute, conflict, or even simple misunderstanding escalated into a lost job, a dissolved partnership, and/or a costly legal battle. Inevitably their story is filled with regret or resentment that things were not handled differently. As a mediator specializing in employee relations, partnership issues, and business disputes, I can only agree... "I wish you knew me earlier too."

The truth of the matter is, sometimes timing isn't the problem....fear is. Mediation is something foreign to most people who wrongly confuse it with either litigation or arbitration. Some have even worked with a mediator who did not perform as a true neutral, or who pushed for an agreement when the parties weren't ready or in full agreement. Still others fear that they will be forced into a compromise they don't wish to make. So they sue, they quit, they suffer.

As a mediator this saddens and frustrates me. I know the value of helping people to hear each other, and to understand each other. I know that the fear they may be feeling will be quelled within minutes of the process beginning. And I know that the process makes it easier to communicate and resolve differences....making it possible to truly arrive at a win-win ending.

My hope is that this blog helps to chip away at the resistance, and that more people talk about mediation as an exceptional service and vehicle for conflict resolution.